Ragoût de mouton and an overwhelming smell of bullshit – Chelsea, April the 1st 2013

An early kick off meant a subdued atmosphere from United fans compared to the last time were at this cauldron of snides last October. That night, the pathetic home support only woke up after Daniel Sturridge put them in the lead seven minutes into extra time, apart from that, United fans took the piss out of their wooden counterparts. Yesterday at Stamford Bridge, it was more of the same. Stood in the lower tier of Shed end of Chelsea’s modern but soulless stadium, we couldn’t hear a whisper out of Chelsea fans until Demba Ba’s admittedly brilliant goal, three minutes into the second half, put them into the lead. United had controlled the game for most of the first half without looking like scoring. Only once in that period was Petr Cech tested, when a bizzare swirling shot from Javier Hernández four minutes before half time produced a great save from the Czech goalkeeper. For all United’s possesion, it was Chelsea who had the first shot on target when Demba Ba tried catching David De Gea out on his near post after half an hour. It put me in mind of the rope-a-dope tactics Muhammad Ali deployed in his 1974 fight against George Foreman in Kinshasa.

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A team of lemon sherbets – Manchester United V Newcastle United Boxing day 2012

In a match that had seven goals United took the lead for the first time in the game on the cusp of injury time when Javier Hernández forced the ball home after Wallsend old boy, Michael Carrick threaded the ball through for him score. The lethargy in Newcastle’s performance became obvious after Robin van Persie equalised for the third time for United on 71 minutes. For all that, Sammy Ameobi hit the post on 87 to give Old Trafford yet another heart stopping moment.

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