Burst The bubbles – East London 5th of January 2013

Gutted, absolutely gutted, were the West Ham fans in the Priory Road/East Stand at the Boleyn Ground when Robin Van Persie equalised just into injury time yesterday. It was a very pleasing sight after all the gloating that had been going on in the previous twenty minutes. The noise from the West Ham fans, in anticipation of victory was reaching a level of crescendo until Van Persie burst the bubbles. The sudden heartbroken silence was a joy to behold followed by the sheer terror in the ranks of the ‘appy ammas’ (sic) as they suddenly realised there was going to be a siege on their goal for the last two minutes. When Van Persie equalised, the result of a truly brilliant crossfield switch pass from Ryan Giggs, I could see United getting a winner. That United didn’t was down to two dreadful finishes, one from Shinji Kagawa and the other from Antonio Valencia seconds before referee Martin Atkinson blew the final whistle.

They might as well have been have been sick, West Ham whilst technically, clearly  second best to United, were hungier for both the ball and the result. West Ham equalised with a goal from James Collins on 27 minutes, four minutes after a calm and clinical finish from Tom Cleverley had given United the lead. The equaliser for West Ham, a free header gifted to Collins from a Joe Cole cross was a scandalously sloppy goal to concede. Once can be considered unlucky but when the trick was repeated by both Joe Cole and James Collins in the 59th minute for an almost carbon copy of the previous goal, to put West Ham deservedly 2-1 in front, that was another thing altogether. I could just about forgive it if United’s defence were caught out twice in the same manner in the same half but did Sir Alex Ferguson say anything to Uniteds defence at the half time break about West Hams equaliser? If so, did the players spoken to listen? This was an apology of a performance from United, the defence looked wobbly, the midfield couldn’t pass water and Hernandez was caught offside so often that he reminded me of a practice that we called goalhanging when we played football on the street as children.

For the third time this season and the second weekend in succesion, Sir Alex Ferguson had to bring on Robin Van Persie as substitute to do what could be called a firemans job. The first time he did this was in Braga when Van Persie invigorated an appalling United performance to equalise and then be instrumental in a very unfair 3-1 win. Last weekend against West Bromwich Albion, Van Persie came on as substitute to calm a very nervous Old Trafford crowd to seal the result in injury time. Yesterday, he rescued a clueless and well beaten United side to salvage a replay, again in injury time. We were told before Van Persie signed for United last summer that he was injury prone, maybe he is and we’ve been lucky, but thank Christ for that luck. It doesn’t bear thinking about where United would be without him either in the team or as back up at the moment (can any statistical fetishists out there tell me?). The one chance that always comes to a team chasing a one goal deficit late in a match came to Ryan Giggs when he put a free header over the bar seconds before the 4th official announced, to a chorus off anxious boos from the West Ham fans, four minutes of stoppage time. They may well boo but that’s what happens when players who are being substituted dawdle off the pitch in the manner of Liverpool reject Joe Cole did today.

Pre kick off, there was a machine that was pumping out thousands of bubbles on the halfway line of the East Stand. Having seen this effect on the television in the past, I wasn’t naïve enough to think that a mass of West Ham fans would be blowing bubbles out of a tube and plastic wand, but fuckin’ hell, what’s all that about? The atmosphere amongst United fans in the Trevor Brooking stand was pretty subdued throughout the game. After the brilliant performance of travelling reds at Stamford Bridge last time United were playing in London on halloween night, it was a bit of an anti climax. West Ham had for reasons unknown, slashed a thousand tickets off United’s allocation for yesterdays match. It was sickening seeing reds outside the stadium on Green Street and Tudor Street looking desperately for tickets but what made it worse was come kick off, there was an abundance of un-occupied seats in the Upper tier of the Trevor Brooking stand where we were perched. I was told by a mate of mine watching the match on ITV that the atmosphere in the ground sounded brilliant. The West Ham fans in the East Stand were certainly up for the match, making plenty of noise and unfortunately reciting the usual stereotypes. At one point, they were singing to United fans ‘you only live rarrnd tha coowna’ immediately followed by Manchester being full of shit. Make your minds up, which one is it? One credit I will give the West Ham fans is for when they all started singing ‘Let’s all do the Barthez’ followed by them raising their right hands up in the air, that was genuinely funny. Shame there wasn’t more of that wit on display from them.

Lucky banner, yet to see United lose a match, at the Boleyn Ground yesterday (photo courtesy of Neil Meehan)

Many thanks to Chris from http://www.jamiesoncontracting.co.uk/ for sorting the tickets out

13 thoughts on “Burst The bubbles – East London 5th of January 2013”

  1. The match going whu fans really are a confused and deluded lot. They, first of all have no idea of geography north of there local boozer. We were cockneys, Welsh, and most confusingly of all, scousers. They don’t have an original tune to chant to. They just bastardise other teams noise. Pathetic. The bubble song only gets going when cranked up by the stadium record player. And that silly little ‘bubow ‘ machine, enough said. Then they greet a serial failure like joke hole, as if he came back by choice. No you nitwits, he was gutted because he couldn’t join ‘arry at qpr. He got a substantial amount of money to join that squalid little club. Thought just let you in on it. Really looking forward to that crummy lot coming ‘nofe’. If they can find it. Good read Murph.

    1. The point of that chant is that most man u fans are glory hunters, lazy football fans who’ve chosen a team for it’s exisiting success, rather than for being local. That’s why hammers fans are so proud of their team. Typically you demonstrate that man u arrogance, ignorance. I feel sorry for you because you have no clue what it feels like to support a club. You support a corporation. Old trafford may hold 70k but your atmosphere is rotten, quiet and uninspired. To top it off, your manager, whilst being one of the most successful, is one of the most disrespectful – “newcastle are a wee club in the north-east” – just not true. He did not even turn up to the post match press interview at west ham. Man utd – no class and arrogance. It’s no wonder you’re hated by the majority of the country.

      1. Do wot jon? I forgot when I was writing this blog what a good family club West Ham were. A club that between 1901/1989 had a grand total of four managers and since 1989 have had nine. The last of those four managers, John Lyall, who’d been incumbent for fifteen years was treated brilliantly by your poxy little fraud of a family club. Maybe I’m wrong, maybe West Ham is full of lovable people where you can leave the doors open at all hours (apart from when it’s cold obviously), where everybody loves their mothers, where Ron ‘n’ Reg always looked after their own and where everybody gathers rarrnd the ol’ joanna on a sanday noyt for a good ol’ knees ap. Or maybe, as I believe to be true, it’s full of patronised gobshites who pride themselves on living near the queen without any visible benefit and that’s before I go on about this family club being presently owned by a couple of gentlemen who made their money in pornography. As for your atmosphere, sure you were gonna be up for it on Saturday, but I was reading in the West Ham fanzine Over Land And Sea, people moaning about the poor recent atmosphere at the Boleyn Ground when you played a staggeringly poor Norwich side. I’m no fan of Millwall but I’ll give them one thing, they are genuine football fans who don’t go around expecting love and admiration from all corners under some bollocks claim of righteousness like West Ham do, your club and the people that follow it, are full of shit.

        1. Dear jon, (just in case your in jail), lazy football fans don’t travel half the length of this septic Isle to watch their team. Especially to that rancid hole, full of jolly salt of the earth bomb dodgers in the east, jolly old end. Cor bloimey moyt. Do you lot ever check what you have written. Chirpy cockney? Mythology. Grumbling Alf Garnets when it comes to it. Since I’ve been watching UNITED, west h have been up and down more times than Barbra Windors draws. Glory hunters? Last time I checked freedom of movement is ours by right. Thats why the Eastenders won the war for us. I assume you got no pleasure from the Gold Medals, collected by ‘Team GB’. Unless of course they are related to you. Or live within bubow blowing distance from that shit heap of a ground. If you respect Nobby more so much, why did name that carsey of a stand in his honour. More of an insult. And do you wear your corblimeytrazzis tucked in your daisyroots. Keep in touch, Mustapha

          1. Lads I’m not myself a WHU fan. I just dislike the arrogance with which Man Utd fans compose themselves. Your fans are lazy in their choice of team, not their travels. Respect to them for supporting their team but to be honest, none for the team chosen. I don’t know if Hammers fans are “gobshites”, whatever that means, but from what you’ve written, you certainly seem to have a “gob” full of “shite”. West Ham is one of many teams in this country which have a great, genuine support. Spurs, Newcastle, Pompey are all similarly well supported. Your lot simply are jumping on a band wagon, and are so acutely aware of this that they become enraged when anyone deigns to tell them the truth.

            It’s churlish to attack me by trying to render the cockney accent in script. Even if I were from East London, that would lend no weight to your argument. Nevertheless, now you’ve started to, I will insoolt the dopaay, slooo soundin’ nawwthen way of speakin’, if indeed that’s where you’re from, which I doubt.

            If I were an “‘amma”, as you so aptly put it, I would rather have two English managers who are fans of my club, than avaricious profiteerers from the US prostituting my club to Asia. The fact that they’ve made their money from porn in part makes no difference on how family orientated the club may be. They are two separate enterprises.

            I’ll leave it at that. You didn’t respond to my point that your manager is childish, arrogant, one who lacks respect and is often wrong (RvP didn’t nearly die, Newcastle isn’t a small club in the North-East; it holds 50k stadium which it regularly fills) so I assume I’ve convinced you, which is all I intended to do. I have no doubt you’ll win the title against your (fellow) glory hunting Mancunians. And credit to you for trying to defend your plastic team, two of which – Ferdinand and Carrick, helped you to draw against a West Ham team you rate so lowly that you hope will get relegated. (The ‘you’ is plural)

          2. That you choose not to say who your chosen team and that you choose to judge my comments as arrogant is your prerogative. That you choose to assume that I’m not a Northerner/Mancunian is a pretty lazy assumption to make but one that I’m not going to attempt to correct you on as I neither see the point, the relevance or what it has got to do with what I write or you. If you convince yourself that you’ve convinced me then nothing I have to say will change that. I don’t remember saying that I wished West Ham would be relegated but I will admit that if they did, I wouldn’t miss them. If they go down, they go down, I’ve seen them do that umpteen times since I first started watching football in 1981. One more thing, I didn’t know that the previous owners of Birmingham City were really lifelong West Ham fans. I also didn’t know that they brought West Ham in a fit of altruism for the benefit of the club and the local community and not for the potential for making money out of the club. How important is it to you for an English football club to be English owned?

          3. jon, with no noticeable identity. Living in Old Trafford, my team chose me. However you can, as I said before, go where you wish in this country, to watch your chosen entertainment. Having watched UNITED since the mid fifties, I have had my loyalty tested quite a few times. This band wagon you speak of, has been rolling along for along time. In 26 years UNITED failed win the title, we were the best supported club in the land. In that space of time you will find newcastle and others have some poor attendance records. Ours stands the closest scrutiny. Alex Ferguson does occasionally baffle even our support. But he’s worth don’t you agree. As history proves, we will follow UNITED, win lose or draw. How did pompey get in there. A clue to your I.D. possibly? Ferdinand and Carrick left west h to further their ambition. Going to a watch a team that’s crap doesn’t get any special respect does it? It certainly doesn’t suit you. UNITED have to maximise it’s commercial reach. We compete with other giants in football, with some success, not the cuddly model you dream of. It’s been professional for a long time. Not just since 92/93. Re the RVP incident, a boxing friend of mine said in all honesty, (not a footy fan) that he could have end up punch drunk. Some of the stuff on here isn’t meant to offensive, a bit of fun sometimes helps.Finally, could anyone explain to us all, just what is plastic fan/club. Maybe some small time, small town funt, could let us in on it. Hope this get you over it.

  2. Great stuff as usual, Murph.

    I feel the same about the ‘Appy ‘Ammers as you do about Wigan. Can’t stand ’em, hope they get relegated, can’t be doing with all that cheery Cockney banter which is usually thinly-veiled aggression – as parodied so brilliantly by Alexei Sayle with ‘Ullo John got a new motor’’ all those years ago…. and how sick are we all of hearing how Ingerland would never have won the World Cup in 1966 if it hadn’t been for the saintly Bobby Moore plus Geoff Hurst and Martin Peters….?

    Now it’s the Homecoming Kid, that tosser Joe Cole – a reject for the Dippers, but with a £3 million pay-off from them for being useless and now reconstituted as a born- again gorblimey East Ender – and of course, he decides to have something approaching a good game yesterday. Typical, but if we’d been at it, he’d never have had the opportunity.

    Like you, I never dreamt that RvP would have the impact he has, but it’s just as well because too many others are having a thin time of it – none more so than Shinji Kagawa.

    Can somebody explain to me why we bought this guy? What is it exactly that he is supposed to be doing in the team? Yes, yes, I’ve heard all the stuff about him needing time to settle into English football and about him getting injured, but it is now January. He’s been at United for nearly 6 months and has achieved what, precisely? This is the same guy who was going to revolutionise our midfield, right?

    As it is, we’re still dependent on Carrick plus a shifting selection of veterans and wannabees. Oh, and Fabio, who despite being first-choice right back was used in midfield yesterday instead of promoting Tunnicliffe or another of the promising kids. But that’s another story…..

    Hopefully we’ll stuff their bubbles ‘darn their froats’ in the replay…… Laaaavvly…..

  3. shocking away support from Manchester 2.. 5000 away fans and not a peep from them when 2-1 down. It must be nice to play away and expect a result without having to actually support the team.

    1. Paul, if that’s the best wind up line you’ve got, you should stick it in the bubble machine. At least that made us all piss ourselves laughing your attempt on tradition.

      1. Bubble machine or no bubble machine, you were outplayed and outsung by newly promoted West Ham. And i’m pretty sure that the Chelmsford Reds flag was just slightly more embarrassing for you lot to be honest.

        1. Can only re iterate. Freedom, you tunnel sighted fool. Embarrassed? Why? They turn up at Old Trafford on a regular basis and they are welcome. Support at our club has many races, faces, colours, and creeds. So an English accent no matter how mangled does not matter in the least. I take it nobody but a good old ‘mockney’ boy or girl is welcome in the that part of london. Didn’t the hear Bow Bells once while I was there. Did you?

        2. Newly promoted West Ham? Is that supposed to impress or something? Since I first watched football I’ve seen a ‘newly promoted West Ham’ in 1981, 1991, 1993, 2005 and 2012. West Ham are not as much newly promoted as like a bad case of mould on football. You wash it away, in this case/context, relegation, and it comes back a little while later just as horrible as it ever was. Shocking support? You and your Alf Garnett cloned cohorts only turned out because United were there, I read in the West Ham fanzine, Over Land And Sea, a column moaning about the atmosphere at the Boleyn Ground but we knew you would be up for it for the visit of our team, it’s one of the highlights of your season (when you happen to be in the Premier League). Looking forward to your move to the Olympic Stadium?

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