Tag: Ashley Young

Birds Of A Feather, Norwich 28th of December 2013

Four days after the turkeys were stuffed, United decided yesterday to continue the avian theme and stuff the canaries in deepest Norwich. After a lie down and a warming bowl of porridge, I’m now of the knowledge that yesterday was a good win for United against a staggeringly poor Norwich.

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United fans in the Compleat Angler on Prince of Wales Road before yesterday match

United fans had already resigned themselves to being one down in the 15th minute when Wes Hoolahan somehow missed an open net in the Barclay End of Carrow Road. Continue reading Birds Of A Feather, Norwich 28th of December 2013

Righteously Wronged And The Ignoble Noble – Manchester 22nd of December 2013

It’s not been a bad week. After last Sunday’s stroll in Villa Park, United qualified for the League cup semi-final via a potentially tricky away match at Stoke City. With an almost biblical downpour of hailstones, referee Mark Clattenburg took both teams off the pitch on 30 minutes. That sagacious analyst on SKY Sports, Alan ‘your nose is offside’ Smith, was complaining about it being health and safety gone mad. Smith, a product of the mythical old school where men were men and all that bollocks, would have been the first onto Clattenburg’s back if a player had acquired a serious injury due to the prevailing elements. Another great one from Smith was when he proclaimed early in the game that you could always guarantee a great atmosphere at Stoke. This was when the only noise that could be heard was the 5,000 United fans singing the Twelve Days of Cantona. Stoke fans, apart from their riposte (sic) of ‘shit’ everytime a chant of ‘United’ went up, couldn’t be heard by a dog. Continue reading Righteously Wronged And The Ignoble Noble – Manchester 22nd of December 2013

Behind Enemy Lines – Birmingham 15th of December 2013

United haven’t lost at Villa Park since a League Cup match in October 1999, which resulted in a 3-0 win for Villa. I say this as if ever United could’ve come a cropper at Villa Park since that night, it would’ve been today. Everton and Newcastle have both recently lanced long held unbeaten records at Old Trafford for United. With those results in mind, it wasn’t beyond the realms of ridicule that Aston Villa could end another long unbeaten run for United. That was the feeling ’til just after kick off.

United beat Shaktar Donetsk last Wednesday night in as low key a game as you can imagine at Old Trafford. Maybe the midweek result, courtesy of a rare Phil Jones goal, gave a United a badly needed confidence boost,something that had been badly lacking in the previous two games. The talk quietly emanating out of Aston Villa fans before the game was that United were there for the taking. There weren’t many United fans of my acquaintance who disagreed with that opinion. What nobody had banked on was just how bad Aston Villa would be. I’m sat here scratching my head like Stan Laurel wondering how Villa have somehow managed to beat both Arsenal and Man City. From what I saw today, Villa are garbage.

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View from my seat amongst the Villa fans in the Witton End, as Wayne Rooney is about to take a late corner for United

Continue reading Behind Enemy Lines – Birmingham 15th of December 2013

Always Hurting The One He Loves – Old Trafford November 10th 2013

I sometimes think that the London press faint in orgasmic hypnosis to the words of Arsene Wenger. If you believe the press, you could easily imagine Wenger at nightime sitting serenely in his personal oak panelled library at his house in Totteridge, digesting Richard Feynman’s thesis on Quantum Physics with a background ambience of Bach’s Brandenburg Concerto No.5, whilst sagely sipping a glass of 2006 Bourgogne Chardonnay. Wenger is calm personified, an economics graduate from Strasbourg University and a man who invented modern urbanity. He also, for an educated man, talks an awful lot of bollocks. Continue reading Always Hurting The One He Loves – Old Trafford November 10th 2013

A Walk On The Wild Side – Manchester 29th of October 2013

The canaries were singing so far out of tune as to make “Metal Machine Music” by the recently departed Lou Reed sound melodic. What started out as a song turned quickly into a squawk by the time referee Kevin Friend, gave United a penalty in the 20th minute for a foul committed by Leroy Fer on Adnan Januzaj in the 20th minute. It is possibly one of the softest penalties I’ve ever seen conceded but all the same, a correct call by the referee. Why Fer felt the need to take a walk on the wild side and trip Januzaj when neither he nor the ball was going anywhere threatening to Norwich, only Fer can answer. The fact is that Fer tripped Januzaj in the box, so it’s a penalty regardless of goal threat of whether Januzaj was in control of the ball. The Norwich players and the impressively numbered travelling fans were understandably incensed by the penalty but they should have been blaming Fer for his numb headed stupidity rather than screaming blue murder to the referee. Javier Hernandez sent Norwich goalkeeper Mark Bunn the wrong way wit the resulting penalty. Up until the goal, Norwich looked as staggeringly poor as they normally do. After it, they played with all the promise of a turkey in Bernard Matthews slaughterhouse. In the second half, a headed goal from Hernandez on 55 minutes, a volley from Phil Jones on 88 minutes and a flick from the returned Fabio in injury time sealed a 4-0 win for United. A Phil Jones volley and a goal from Fabio? It was one of those nights.

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View from the C stand on a not so bootiful night (Photo courtesy of Daniel Burdett)

Continue reading A Walk On The Wild Side – Manchester 29th of October 2013